Bureaucracy doesn’t have anything to do with democracy. It doesn't matter which kind of government you support, bureaucracy always ends up ruling your life.
From my experience in the places I’ve lived, democracies take pride in being democratic. In schools they teach their youngsters that the purpose of the state is to serve its citizens. Unlike JFK's famous inaugural speech, it's not about them anymore, now it's about us.
The citizens are the justification for the existence of the state and their wellbeing is the end of its goals. Citizens pay taxes to ensure that the state will provide them with security to live free and thrive. Citizens agree to obey the laws of the state in order to create a fair and constructive environment so that all can have the chance to prosper equally.
One of the things that bothered me the most while living in Israel was the relationship between state and church and the ambiguity of the term "Jewish democratic state," which is what Israel proclaims to be.
On a daily basis Israel violets one of the basic rights of its citizens, the right for free choice in marriage. As an Israeli citizen who served the obligatory three years in the army and paid his taxes lawfully, I was forbidden to marry the woman I love under Israeli law.
Marriages in Israel are performed under the auspices of the religious authority of the religious community to which couples belong. If two individuals who belong to different religions decide to get married, they have to go to a civil court, which practically means that they have to get married outside the borders of the Jewish state. There are reasons for this absurd situation, which has affected my life and the lives of many others, but here is not the place to explain them all.
After moving to Iceland I was surprised to learn that these kinds of absurdities are not exclusive to the Jewish state only. Bureaucracy might change its face but it’s always ugly.
After my wife and I got married, she decided to adopt my last name. A common gesture in the outside world, but not in Iceland. Native Icelanders can't give up their original last names and if they decide to adopt a new name it can only be added to the previous name and it can't be too long.
The length of the name has to fit into the form when filling out the application. Apparently, my last name was one letter too long, which gave my wife the option to give up one letter from my last name or to use only the initial instead. I don’t know which option is worse, but I know neither one is what we wished for.
When we decided to have a child, I never thought that naming our baby would bring us to the second chapter of the bureaucracy saga. Apparently, according to Icelandic law, every child that is registered as an Icelandic citizen has to carry at least one Icelandic name.
The list of the approved names is published on the Ministry of Justice and Ecclesiastical Affairs website. Considering that after more than one year of marriage I still have difficulties pronouncing my wife’s name, the list of Icelandic names seems somewhat limited.
I also learned that there is a special committee in charge of human names and for a fee of ISK 2,000 (USD 15.70, EUR 11.90) you can apply for a new name to be approved and added to the list. Looking at the history of people’s requests I knew that I shouldn’t be too optimistic; the committee guidelines are pretty strict and most requests are rejected.
I wonder if wishing to marry the woman I love in the country were I was born is asking too much? Or is it asking too much to be solely responsible for naming your child without following guidelines, asking for permission and filling out forms?
For me the answer is very clear. Iceland never stops to surprise me. Every day I discover more of these small things that make me feel like I’m home.
From my experience in the places I’ve lived, democracies take pride in being democratic. In schools they teach their youngsters that the purpose of the state is to serve its citizens. Unlike JFK's famous inaugural speech, it's not about them anymore, now it's about us.
The citizens are the justification for the existence of the state and their wellbeing is the end of its goals. Citizens pay taxes to ensure that the state will provide them with security to live free and thrive. Citizens agree to obey the laws of the state in order to create a fair and constructive environment so that all can have the chance to prosper equally.
One of the things that bothered me the most while living in Israel was the relationship between state and church and the ambiguity of the term "Jewish democratic state," which is what Israel proclaims to be.
On a daily basis Israel violets one of the basic rights of its citizens, the right for free choice in marriage. As an Israeli citizen who served the obligatory three years in the army and paid his taxes lawfully, I was forbidden to marry the woman I love under Israeli law.
Marriages in Israel are performed under the auspices of the religious authority of the religious community to which couples belong. If two individuals who belong to different religions decide to get married, they have to go to a civil court, which practically means that they have to get married outside the borders of the Jewish state. There are reasons for this absurd situation, which has affected my life and the lives of many others, but here is not the place to explain them all.
After moving to Iceland I was surprised to learn that these kinds of absurdities are not exclusive to the Jewish state only. Bureaucracy might change its face but it’s always ugly.
After my wife and I got married, she decided to adopt my last name. A common gesture in the outside world, but not in Iceland. Native Icelanders can't give up their original last names and if they decide to adopt a new name it can only be added to the previous name and it can't be too long.
The length of the name has to fit into the form when filling out the application. Apparently, my last name was one letter too long, which gave my wife the option to give up one letter from my last name or to use only the initial instead. I don’t know which option is worse, but I know neither one is what we wished for.
When we decided to have a child, I never thought that naming our baby would bring us to the second chapter of the bureaucracy saga. Apparently, according to Icelandic law, every child that is registered as an Icelandic citizen has to carry at least one Icelandic name.
The list of the approved names is published on the Ministry of Justice and Ecclesiastical Affairs website. Considering that after more than one year of marriage I still have difficulties pronouncing my wife’s name, the list of Icelandic names seems somewhat limited.
I also learned that there is a special committee in charge of human names and for a fee of ISK 2,000 (USD 15.70, EUR 11.90) you can apply for a new name to be approved and added to the list. Looking at the history of people’s requests I knew that I shouldn’t be too optimistic; the committee guidelines are pretty strict and most requests are rejected.
I wonder if wishing to marry the woman I love in the country were I was born is asking too much? Or is it asking too much to be solely responsible for naming your child without following guidelines, asking for permission and filling out forms?
For me the answer is very clear. Iceland never stops to surprise me. Every day I discover more of these small things that make me feel like I’m home.
Published in Iceland Review April 16, 2009.
12 comments:
THAT IS SO UNFAIR!!! A COUPLE SHOULD NOT HAVE TO
GET APPROVAL ON NAMING A CHILD OR TAKING A LAST NAME...SOUNDS LIKE WHERE YOU LIVE IS STILL IN THE DARK AGES...
I SAY LIVE AND LET LIVE...MONA
No state, city, or country should continue on with what seems to be an obvious limit to a so called "democracy." We have many small things in the U.S. that breach our constitutional rights in one form or another. After reading this, I am more grateful for some of the rights we do have here. That is completely absurd!! Naming your children,and you're wife wanting to take your last name should be something you two should choose together. A country should have no say in that. Wow, what a box we live in. I had no idea Iceland had such control over its people. Thanks for posting! N the reality check!
היי מה קורה?
הפוסט הזה הוא אישי במיוחד ואולי זאת דרך בשבילך כדי לשחרר את הכעס התסכול שאתה בטח מרגיש כלפי שתי המדינות והחוקים שלהן...
מה לעשות, אנחנו חושבים שאנחנו חופשיים בתוך המדינה בה אנחנו גרים, אבל זה לא באמת ככה...
גם אני ביום כזה שאני קצת כועסת על גורם "צד ג'" אז אני אשמח מאוד אם נוכל לדבר ולשמוע את הדעה שלך (זה קשור לספרד וכנראה אני מחליטה לא לנסוע)
נשיקות ושבת שלום לכולם!
אבי
נ.ב: היום גיליתי שכתבת הקדמה ל(מקווה!)ספר. עוד לא קראתי את זה, אבל אל דאגה, אני אודיע לך ברגע שאקרא את זה =)
I live in the States and I often hear people in my area complain about how the government over the last few decades has become increasingly "big-brother"-ish. The interventionist policies are apparently tarnishing our liberties; however, it's posts like these that make me glad that I moved to the States. I'll gladly accept these "problems" if it means that I have the ability to keep my name and marry whom I wish. And my name is pretty damn long at 30 letters! There can never be a government that is totally "laissez-faire" or bureaucracy-free, but sometimes...people here forget that. Thank you for sharing this, I'll try not to take for granted the freedoms I have.
I sympathise with your dilemma, but Iceland is not alone in having a list of "approved" names for children, and when I hear some of the dumb names given to kids here in the UK I sometimes think it's no bad thing (Fifi Trixibelle springs to mind as bordering on child abuse!). Maybe a solution to your dilemma would be to do what used to be common here, where a person was given a name, but always called by something else (John's became Jack, Elizabeth's became Betty), so you could register your child with an Icelandic name that's acceptable to you, but then call s/he whatever your real preference was?
To be fair I'll say that Iceland's bureaucracy is far from being bad, it's actually good, as good as bureaucracy can be. When you need to work with governments offices and get things done, things usually work smoothly.
The Problem is that Iceland has some "middle ages" kind of laws that can be frustrating sometimes and the real problem is that no one here think there is a problem with that.
Wow I agree with the others who live in America sometimes we tend to forget or not realize that there are other nations out there with a lot less freedoms than us. I am glad that the government processes are so much easier, but I think I would stand in line for a week to be able to take my hubby's name and choose my children's names. I can't imagine what I would have done if I couldn't have named my kids what they are named. I am one of those people who likes unique names but not the crazy ones like apple just something that 5 kids in the same class wont be named. Thank you again for reminding me that I take a few things for granted and I hope that you find a great name for your baby. You will know it when you see it. My motto is also all they can say is no if you try so its worth trying. Have a great weekend. Angie L
Bureaucracy cries for intervention, so use your connections. You've met the president of Iceland a couple of weeks ago, put a smile on your face and pay a visit to mr. prezidente:)
Neither case has anything to do with bureaucracy, and everything to do with the strengths or weaknesses of democracy. If Israelis were to put a strong, secular government in power, chances are good that it would separate religion and state.
The law in Iceland obviously has to do with a small people trying to preserve its identity. But the freely voting people of Iceland could get the law changed.
Thank you for continuing to give us an inside view of this fascinating country!
Thank you so much once again for giving us insight into your life. You lay out your life for all the world to see, that is so rare in this day and age. Bless you Guy, and Bless your Beautiful Wife, you are a very lucky man to have found her. I learn so much everytime I read what you post.
Shalom
Marcia
anarchy
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